Marrying people off – A national past time it seems

“So what kind of a girl are you looking for?” asked my aunt. “Go on, go on tell me it’s OK, you need not feel shy”. Feeling shy I definitely was not, but feeling angry I definite was. But she is my aunt, so you know how I am expected to react. I just smiled. “You should get yourself a homely girl who will stay at home & take care of the house. Somebody has to be at home always you know, its good”. So there you go the answer was given by her even before I got a chance to think about it.

A few days back a pandit was at home to conduct some rituals. While all the necessary items required for it was being arranged around him he looked at me & asked in chaste Kannada, “What is your Nakshatra?” I looked at him & gaped & then I looked around to check if anybody could help me with that. Luckily my sister answered that for him. He then asked me my date of birth & I immediately knew where this was headed. Obviously I couldn’t do anything else but tell him my date of birth. He removed a big bag, put on his glasses & started looking for something. I quietly got up & moved away from there. For all I knew, if I continued sitting there he would have shown me a photograph of a girl & asked me if I liked her.

I suppose most of us have already been through this situation or will shortly undergo something like this. I suppose it is a pretty obvious topic at some point of time in one’s life but it is quite unbelievable how people you just know somehow, somewhere wanting to play the role of a match maker without any initiative from your side. Just about everybody wants to know what kind of a girl you want and invariably end up giving their own opinion on what kind will suit the concerned person & why & so on. I don’t understand why people don’t value the fact that someone’s marriage is a very personal thing for the person getting married & that way the responsibility of his immediate family. No, that is not so simple at all. They are all our well wishers, so everybody will want to play a part.

But I find this experience also funny because I wonder isn’t there anything else that some people can think of while having a conversation. A few days back when mom & I were at a supermarket a lady who mom knew was right behind us at the billing counter. So after all the initial talk, she looked at me & asked mom “Is this your son?” Mom nodded & guess what the lady’s next question was - “Is he married?” Mom answered “No” & for that the lady’s reaction was “When are you planning to get him married”

At some point I think it also starts getting to the parents as well. For how long can one possibly go on giving answers like this? They would obviously like to simply answer “Yes he is married” or “He is getting married” & be done with it. So that pressure starts percolating down to the boy or the girl who are left with no choice but drop all other plans & take the plunge.